Surrendering My Dream, Finding My Purpose

Ben Cox of the Journey Magazine and High Country 365 sits down with Edward Graham to talk about faith, family and life back in Boone. Edward has left his military career early to follow in God’s leading to return to Boone and work at Samaritan’s Purse. Edward is the son of Franklin and grandson of Billy Graham.

Transcript:

Ben: Hello my name is Ben Cox. I’m with the Journey Magazine and the website too; www.JourneyNC.com. And we’re based here in Boone North Carolina. I’m here with Edward Graham from Samaritan’s Purse, which also has offices here in Boone. Edward, thanks so much for taking some time out of your busy schedule for this interview. I really appreciate it.

Edward: Well thanks Ben. Thanks for having me.

Growing Up in Boone

Ben: So, to get us started, I’d like for you to just introduce yourself and then, from that, to give some insight into how you came to know the Lord personally. And then maybe who helped you in that process, the discipleship process that comes right after that?

Edward: Well, I’m Edward Graham. I’m Franklin’s third youngest son. There’s four of us children. There’s three boys and then my little sister, Cissie. I came along…

But starting, Will is the only one born outside of Boone. So Will’s the oldest; he was born in Colorado. But Roy, myself, and my sister; we’re all born here in Watauga County at the Watauga County hospital. But Boone has been our home. It’s all I remember. 

I was raised, my first year or so, in a house out near State Farm. Right there below Bill Dale’s house, right below State Farm. But then we bought out on George Hayes Rd and that’s where I spent my life. I love Boone North Carolina. It’s all I ever knew.

Making Faith My Own

Edward: (continued) I was raised in this ministry, but it doesn’t mean I’m a Christian. And you know you’re not born into that. So the ministry’s all I’ve ever known between that and the Billy Graham Evangelistic Association.

When I was a young child, when I was about five-years-old, we were out at one of my Grandfather’s crusades out in California. And, we had been to Knot’s Berry Farm. We bought these little tanks. We were playing with these little toy tanks with my brothers, and they got mad at me because I always beat them at everything and they started teasing me about not being a Christian. And I didn’t know what that meant, but I was angry. 

And I said something to my mother about it and she explained what a Christian was. And, my mother is the one that led me to the Lord. The faith was not my own, you’re five-years-old, I knew what I was doing, I actually remember it well. And I remember sitting on that hotel bed with her and that conversation even at five-years-old.

But it really wasn’t until high school, my senior year in high school. The church I was attending at that time was Mt. Vernon Baptist Church. I grew up at Alliance Bible Fellowship. But we started attending Mt. Vernon for the youth group. And it was there that I probably made my faith my own.

Now, it was tested when I went to the United States Military Academy. And that’s where I really found my faith. And my relationship with Jesus Christ then really became front and center and the rock that I sat on and relied on. And that’s when I truly surrendered my life to the Lord.

My Journey

Ben: Well let’s just segue off that to talk about your military career. How you chose that career path? And give us maybe one or two examples of how your faith in Christ helped you at some crucial times.

Edward: So, we talked about my sister being born at Watauga Hospital. I can remember going to pick her up, but I was dressed in combat boots, my pants tucked in. I had a jungle hat on. I had my LBE (load bearing equipment), the army gear on, and a toy gun. At that time they allowed you to carry a cap gun into the hospital. They probably wouldn’t let you do that now.

But, I went in to pull security for my sister. She was coming out at… Bottom line, that was how I was raised. I had two posters on my wall growing up. One was an Army ranger, the other was a West Point poster. I always wanted to go into the military and serve in special operations.

So, when you have those two posters and you graduate Watauga High School, what do you do? Well, I went to Liberty University and I played soccer. And I realized there… it was a great school and I had a great time, Dr. Falwell was very good to me while I was there. But I realized I wasn’t living my dream.

My father was speaking at West Point and I had a talk with one of my friends, a well known kid here named Greg Cooper. We both wrestled together. A lot of people knew Greg’s sister, Lee Wallace, kind of a famous person here. Lee was very good to me, unfortunately we lost her years ago. But, Greg and I went to West Point together. And he was a year ahead of me because he came straight out of High School and I went to Liberty for a year.

Living My Dream

Edward: (continued) And it was there that I ended up living my dream. I ended up joining the ranger regiment. That’s what I always wanted to do, which is a small special operations unit. And I ended up doing that pretty much for the next 16 years of my military career.

I loved what I did in the military. My grandmother, Ruth Graham, we called her Tai-Tai. She encouraged me early on when I went to West Point, “This is a mission field and no greater mission opportunity for you to go serve in the Army.”

I didn’t go there to be a chaplain. I’ve had some great chaplains. But I went there to lead men and to lead men into combat. And I’ve had some unbelievable opportunities. I was surrounded by talent, men of great character and great moral fiber. And to be honest, there were a lot of believers in special operations. And the Lord blessed me.

I had some horrible times too. I did eight combat deployments, really between Afghanistan and Iraq. I’ve spent most of my time though in Afghanistan. Six of those deployments were there. I know that country well. I know combat in that country well. And there were some hard times.

But the Lord always delivered me and was always beside me. I never felt alone. I definitely felt frustrated, hurt, and broken maybe at times; but I was never alone. And I finally just got to the point where I knew that maybe I was meant for more, and that’s when I did some heavy praying.

Moving Up the Ladder

Ben: So, that leads right into the next questions. I’m curious to know, if that was your dream career, then what happened in your life to cause you to say, I need to go back to Boone and to work here at SP? And how, then I’m going to ask you kind of a follow up question, how has moving back or how’s your family adjusted to the move? Maybe you could speak a little bit to that.

Edward: So, I was living my dream. And everyone asked me what did I want to do. I wanted to go command a ranger battalion. I wanted to command the ranger regiment. And the chances that I had… it gets to be a steeper and steeper pyramid and there’s a lot of people vying for that job. 

But I knew I had some great opportunities ahead of me, and it looked like those doors were opening. I’d been asked to be… I never wanted to be what they called an aide-de-camp. An aide-de-camp is like an executive assistant to the commanding General. And I was asked to be the aide to the commander of the US Army special operations. This was a three-star-general. 

I just finished being a task force commander and a battalion executive officer in the ranger regiment. The last thing I wanted was to be an aide. And when asked by my boss I said no. I was like, “Sir I’ll do whatever you tell me to do if you’re ordering me to go; but if you’re asking me, no I don’t want to go.” I always thought nerds and career guys were aids and I never wanted to be a nerd. 

It’s just not my skill set. I couldn’t even manage my own career. How am I going to be able to manage this General officer? And I had the interview for the job and lo and behold I got it. The current aide had a lot to say in that. He was a good friend of mine, a guy I spent years with in special operations. He was a year ahead of me at West Point. A great guy. The guy is a stud. 

Most of my jobs, I’ve always replaced guys that were really bad at their jobs. So, it’s easy to look good when you’re replacing a guy that was really bad. This guy was a stud. And I told the commander, I was like, “Sir, I can’t, if you’re expecting me to replace Carter, I can’t do that.” And he just laughed and then asked me when I could show up.

I started working for him. And he was such a humble leader. I love that man and his wife. They were so good to me. You get into a lot of personal conversations. You’re spending a lot of personal time with them. You're always traveling together. But he allowed me to see what a General did. And there’s a lot on his shoulders. He’s an important man. 

But, he was setting me up again for another job in what they call joint special operations. This is to make sure I had all those key positions checked. And he was trying to set me up to be a General. Doesn’t mean you’re going to be one, but he wanted to make sure I had all the right jobs. 

At his retirement ceremony I watched him get in the car. And his wife came up, she kissed me on the cheek and said Edward, “It’s all yours.”

And as they drove away I asked myself, “Is that me in 15 years? Is that how I walk away?” And the answer came back no, a clear… and it hurt. I went up to the office, I was clearing out... My replacement was there, the new General was there, who was very good to me as well. He wanted me to stay on, but I was moving on to another command.

Not For Me

Edward: (continued) And I went to work there for a while and I was miserable. And it wasn’t the job. You know, what I was doing - I was surrounded by great people. But for the first time in my career I was miserable. And that was hard. And I knew battalion command… I was on the promotions list. I was about to go into battalion command. It was all I had ever wanted. What I had been working towards. I wanted to be a ranger battalion commander so bad and that was being set up. 

I went to go speak at the Billy Graham Library for a veteran’s event. And Dr. Richard Furman, whom many of you know in this community. He would be my equivalent to a godfather, if we’d had such a thing. But he was also one of my mentors. Always prayed for me, and prayed for me my whole career. But he wanted to meet up and talk. And we talked about, at that event at the Billy Graham Library, we talked about the future of Samaritan’s Purse, where it was headed, where I was headed. But he asked if I would be interested in coming back to Samaritan’s Purse. 

My father had asked years ago. I was stuck in an airplane with him in Alaska and He asked if I would be willing to leave the rangers and come work for him, he needed help. And I said no. I did not want to work for my father. I never wanted to be in the ministry. To be honest, I think it never looks good when a lot of family is working in the ministry.

The General I worked for during the funeral for my grandfather, we were watching the TV in his office and we were watching the processional. I didn’t want to go to it yet. I was kind of dragging my feet until the DC portion stuff happened. Then I’d go up and be with the family. But he asked, “Edward would you ever do this, is this something you feel...” And I said, “No sir, this is not what I’m called to do.” 

Feeling Change Coming

Edward: (continued) But after my conversation that day with Dick Furman, I committed to coming if something happened to my father. I drove home that day and I called my wife, and I told her what I had committed to. You should never commit to something like that without talking to your spouse first. But she knew I had been struggling and we had kind of talked about this. And she… We went home and we prayed and I was restless. I didn't sleep for a couple days. I finally called dad and I was like, “Dad, let’s finish that Alaska conversation.” And dad and I had a little talk there. And at the end of that conversation I told him, “If you want me, I’m yours. I’ll come.” 

Boy that hurt. It’s not what I wanted to say. But I knew I had to say it. And I’m sitting outside of my headquarters in the parking lot. We’re doing an exercise. It’s in the middle of the night and he’s in Alaska so the time change is alright. And he goes, “Edward, let’s talk again later.” So we talked about two days later and he’s like, “Edward, I want you to stay until retirement.” Because I was four years away from retirement. 

My wife was so relieved, she was like “Oh! We get to stay in the Army longer.” She loved the Army. She was a brat, it’s all she’s ever known… A military brat being born and raised in the Army. And she loved what I did. And she wanted me to command in the rangers more than I did. And then again I didn’t sleep.

Wisdom From my Brothers

Edward: (continued) I called my brother Will and I called my brother Roy. My brother Will shared the story of leaving the ninety-nine to go after the one. Because Will was the pastor of our church in Raleigh, and dad had asked him to come and help at the Billy Graham Association. And Will said no for years. So I asked him - I had never asked Will why he went. And he shared that story and he broke down crying. He was cutting grass one day when it hit him. And he left, because he felt that calling.

But when talking to my brother Roy, and I asked him, I was like, “should I stay to retirement?”

My brother Roy goes, “Well, the disciples left their nets in the water, and they followed - they didn’t go and sell the fish, and they didn’t go and tell their mother goodbye or here’s all this fish, take it to the market and set their mother up. They left and followed Jesus.”

Finishing Strong

Edward: (continued) So, I called dad back and I’m like, “Dad I’m getting out.” So I got out four years shy of retirement.

But my only commitment to my father is… I did not come because I expect to run Samaritan’s Purse. I only came because I was told to come and help my father finish strong. My father is fine health wise. But God called me to come and serve alongside my father and under him, to learn from him, but to help him finish strong and to help transition Samaritan’s Purse to whoever he or she is, ordained by God to run this organization. 

That’s my calling - to help that transition. And that’s why I’ve come here. But boy have I been drinking from the fire hose. Samaritan's Purse is a lot larger than it was when I left. My last job at Samaritan’s Purse, I pulled weeds in High School.

Boone, Calling us home

Ben: Now, your wife’s name is Kristy, is that right?

Edward: Kristy. That’s right.

Ben: So, if she didn’t want to come, how’s she doing now?

Edward: So, that summer before I had ever committed to anything. About a year before my commitment. We’d come up and spent a couple days here and it was a beautiful summer week here. Boone, you know the best summers ever - in Boone. And we were sitting there at the old house I grew up on, in the old farmhouse. And we’re looking at the pond. The kids are running around. We’re up on the hill and my wife goes, “This is awesome!” And she goes, “I do love it here. I could live in Boone one day.”

And I was like, “Whew, maybe when I retire one day, that’s probably another 15 years honey. But I don’t know what I would do here.”

And she says, “You don’t think you’d work for your dad?”

And I was like, “No, it’s not what I’m called to do.” And at that time I wasn’t. I really wasn’t. I had no calling, no feeling, didn't want it.

Fitting in

Edward: (continued) She loves Boone and loves the people. I often hear Boone can be hard for people to move into. Because I was born and raised here - Boone has it’s cliques. You have Appalachian State, which is used to people coming in. But then you have the Watauga County side and the locals. And it’s… there’s its cliques. And Samaritan’s Purse, you think it’s an easy family to move in to. I see that it’s not necessarily that true.

But people have been so wonderful to my wife. When the decision was announced finally that I was coming, people outside of Samaritan's Purse, like people in the Greene family, Dale Greene’s family, Jeff Greene. People like that, their wives reaching out. They didn’t have to do that.

But, Boone, Watauga is such a warm place. When I say clique, don’t take that wrong. It’s a family county. You look between the Critchers, the Greenes… You know there are so many Watauga families, I could go on. I would insult someone if I don’t name all of them, so I probably shouldn’t try. I grew up with these families and I know them. They’re such great people.

We love being back. My wife is enjoying it. Now, does she miss her Army family? She does. We have a lot of dear friends and people still serving and getting after it and going after evil around the world. And we miss that. And then I’ve had guys that have been hurt since then and I watch their spouses struggle as their husbands try to recover. We want to be there for them. And we can, but it’s not the same. So, we do miss that family. But Boone is such a great place to raise a family. 

I’m living pretty close to where I grew up. My kids are going to the same Elementary School. There’s still one teacher there from my era, Mrs. Hodges, Terri Hodges. I love that lady, she’s still there. Hopefully, she doesn't retire before my kids get old enough to go through eighth grade with her. But we’re so excited to be back. And to be raising our family. And the churches here the community again, Samaritan’s Purse. They’ve just been so good to us, welcoming me back.

Adjusting to the move

Ben: Just to jump off, to kind of circle back; so you went, if I’m not mistaken, you went to Blowing Rock Elementary School?

Edward: I did. Yes sir.

Ben: So, your kids are going there?

Edward: They’re going there. They’ll go to the same Elementary School and they’ll be going to the same High School that I went to. Now it’s different. Watauga’s moved. I went up there behind Dr. Moretz’s, at that time, that was his veterinarian clinic. But up there on the hill behind the mall. And now it’s moved, so I haven’t even been to the new one. So, I look forward to going to watch my kids play sports.

You know, I grew up in the era, we didn’t have a good field so we played on Appalachian State’s turf. That’s where I played soccer. And I wrestled while I was here too. I was fortunate to play soccer in college and wrestle in college. So I look back, the High School sports, and with my kids… It’s going to be fun. It’s going to be a great place like I said…

A kid I grew up with now, Josh Honeycutt, is now the head coach and has been doing great things for Watauga soccer. So it’s fun to see my friends and the people I grew up with still in the community and still getting after it and serving. And Josh, now again, I’m proud of him. He’s doing a great job with the soccer program.

Roots here

Ben: Well, my wife and I moved here in 1977. And I believe your parents moved here in 1978. And so, when we first moved here there was some of that, kind of, “You’re not from around here are you.” And there’s not that anymore because there’s such… this is such a melting pot for so many people.

Edward: It is.

Ben: Now, if I hear that I go, “Yeah but my children are.”

Edward: And dad, I think dad for the most part encountered… there were people who lived on our road, some of the Critcher families and some of the Days, the Day family. They were so good to my parents when we first moved out there. Because they knew of my Grandfather and they were just excited to have Franklin there.

Again, not because he was, you know, maybe a son of a famous person. They were just good people welcoming their neighbors. My mother grew up in eastern North Carolina. So her accent did sound different. You know, she’s a flat footer, to come up here. But my mom’s never met a stranger. And was quickly welcomed in by the community here.

But, this is home for all my family. For my brothers, when they come home… Will lives in Asheville now. Roy lives in Charlotte. And then Cissie, who married Corey Lynch. Many people know him from Appalachian State Football - “Superman” as they used to call him. But they live down in Florida. Corey loves Florida. He’s a fisherman. He loves it. My sister misses Boone and loves the mountains. So this will always be my home. And my kids - again they’re so excited. They’re glad they never have to move again. But they’re really enjoying it here and loving it.

A New Role

Ben: Well, we’re glad you’re here. I’ve come to understand that you’re working, or will work in all the major departments at Samaritan's Purse pretty intentionally. So you can get a big picture grasp of things. So, what are you seeing? What’s your perspective on coming here and getting, kind of, immersed in the culture here?

Edward: This was dad’s idea, that I spend about six months with each VP, field VP. So I started off with Luther Harrison, North American Ministries. That’s in Wilkesboro now, that’s where those offices are. But this is all built on Luther’s old farm. You know this is his family’s… Samaritan’s Purse is all built on his family’s farm and he still lives across the street. So, we always tease that when Samaritan’s Purse came here and bought the land Luther came with it. But Luther was a local cop and everyone knew him here. And he left early too. I think he was at the 14 year mark when he left to come to Samaritan’s Purse. So, I learned a lot from him. Just his heart for the ministry to serve. That was the first six months, going after storms and tornadoes and hurricanes with him. 

Then I worked with Operation Christmas Child. To see where Jim Harrelson and the Lord have taken that. I mean, I was here when we first collected. It was about 7,000 shoe boxes that first season. This year was over 10 million. Just unbelievable how God’s using that as an instrument to share the gospel around the world. It’s not a box full of toys. They’re gospel opportunities and the gospel is presented at each passing out of gifts. Each time the gospel is clearly given. Then there’s discipleship training and mentorship training that goes on with these children. And it’s working. And again, Jim’s just doing an unbelievable job.

But now I switched in to projects with Kenny Isaacs. There’s another family that everyone knows. You know Dewey Wright Well Pump company. Kenny was drilling wells out here and then he went to go work for dad in Ethiopia. I call him the “Godfather” because so many different parts of the ministry have spawned from Kenny’s leadership. But I’m working with him and two weeks later this virus pops. So I’ve been drinking from the fire hose.

Learning Samaritan’s Purse

Edward: (continued) But you asked me what I have learned going through. What I’ve learned - from scripture, God entrusts you with five bags of gold, two bags of gold, or one bag based off your talents. And I never want to be that guy that holds on to that one bag and comes back and says here’s your one bag back. I think the Lord has entrusted us with talent, with people here. And the Lord expects us to go out there with His resources and serve aggressively and boldly in the name of Jesus Christ. And that’s what the staff, whether I’m with Luther, whether I’ve been with Jim in Operation Christmas Child, or now with Kenny’s team - the staff here is willing to go out there and partner with the local church. We’re not the church.

We’re not the church, but we partner with the local church. Because one day Samaritan’s Purse will leave the storm, when the work is done it’ll be time for us to move on. But we want that church to be more equipped, more emboldened, more placed into the community. That kids, whether it be the children, the adults, if they make decisions for Christ; we want that church to come and partner alongside them and lift them up.

And that’s what I love seeing the staff do. They’re just incredible, the talent we have here. And I came from a special operations community. I have had  high expectation of what talent is and I’m seeing it all around me. I’m just so blessed with what the Lord has entrusted us with here.

Importance of Discipleship

Ben: Yeah, many of the people that you mentioned are people that I know and respect and it’s been a beautiful thing to, in my time here, to see this ministry evolve. And of course, I think the cornerstone of the Billy Graham organization was, they would never come to a city and do a crusade unless the church was unified, and the church was praying, and the church was there to disciple after they left.

Edward: That’s correct.

Ben: So, that’s really cool to hear that.

Edward: And that’s a great model. Now we go to places around the world that there’s not always a church and that’s different for what Kenny does. But that’s what I love about OCC; it’s finding ways to get in there. There’s bold pastors that are building the structure knowing that it’s empty. But if you do a shoebox distribution the church will come and that’s bold. And those are the people we want to partner with. So again, I’m seeing the Lord and the ministry just spread throughout the world. And, here at Samaritan’s Purse we’re fortunate to be a small part of that and to come alongside some other great organizations and churches that are getting after it.

My Journey, My Identity

Ben: Well I got one more question for you. It seems like, as we’ve been talking about your life and how things have unfolded for you, that you are finding God’s purpose and continuing to find God’s purpose for your life post military career and now. So could you expound just a little bit on what’s your personal journey, where you are now, and maybe even speak to the idea of the importance of purpose once you become a follower of Christ - finding that purpose.

Edward: So, I was in the Lord’s will being in the military. I was exactly where he wanted me. Was He molding me - shaping me? Yes. Was it a waste? Absolutely not. But beyond that, you know again, I thought I was in His will for life, like He was going to take me into retirement and the Army was going to have to tell me to leave. When I left I still struggled. And I’m in Boone, and I’m living in a great place. I’m working at a great ministry. You should have… you should be satisfied. But I still hurt.

Everyone’s like, “Don’t look back.”

My old boss, the General was like, “Edward, don't look back.” Well of course I’ll look back. I loved it. My friends are still back there. It would be different if I left and I was miserable and I hated my whole career. I loved it. I wanted to stay.

But I was wrong on one aspect that I know of is wrong. If you had asked me two or three years ago, “Edward, what are you?”

I would have looked at my uniform and I’d been like, “What are you an idiot? I’m an Army ranger, that’s what I am. That’s my identity.” Now yes, I was a Christian. And I would boldly tell people I was a christian. But at first if someone asked me what are you and what do you do, I would have been like, “Well, I’m an Army ranger and da da da da…” 

No. No, my identity was in Christ. And I was wrong for not proclaiming that. And even here when I struggle with what I was doing here. That’s what I’ve learned. All along my identity is in Jesus Christ. So I think, even when we do our military ministry up in Alaska, a lot of these veterans struggle because they wake up in a hospital, they’re wounded and all of a sudden the paperwork has been signed for them, they're no longer going to be able to serve in the military. Their identity was taken from them.

And I want them to know that the identity was not in the United States Marine Corps, not in the United States Army, not the CIB combat patches and everything I had, all the tabs, all the scrolls that I had. I mean the tan beret that I wore. That’s not my identity. My identity is in Christ. And I want them to know that as well. As a believer in Christ, that’s your identity.

Purpose to Serve

Edward: (continued) So my purpose is to serve. I was a servant as a leader. I believe in servant leadership. In the military I served. Here I serve as well. And I serve my Lord and Savior. I’m doing that under my father and that’s where God has brought me. So when I look at purpose and what God is going to use for me - I don't know. I thought I knew in the military and I got a curveball.

But what I do know is that there’s things that happen in life that are much bigger than me. I can’t control them. I learned that in combat. You have to learn to surrender to it and to give it up. And I had to learn that for myself. My identity - I surrendered that, I gave it up. I’m the Lord’s servant. 

So my purpose is to serve, wherever the Lord takes me, wherever that is. I moved to Boone. I hope I stay in Boone. I love raising my family. But to be honest, if God calls me elsewhere, I’ll go. But I think He’s here for the long haul for me in Samaritan’s Purse to lead that to always be a ministry that is committed to the Lord - to Scripture. That wherever we go we’ll serve in the name of Jesus Christ. And that we’ll be bold and never back down. We’ll never walk to the sound of the guns. We’ll run. And when we get there everyone knows that we’re there to serve and love in the name of Jesus Christ. 

I love what Kenny says. He always says, “The quality of our work will be the platform of our witness.” And we’re going to provide quality. But again, if we’re not allowed to share the gospel, we don’t need to be there. Even in countries that may deny it, we’ll find ways to share the gospel.

In Closing

Ben: Well I’ve… I’m going to look into the camera now because I’ve been moved to tears hearing your testimony. And I think as we talk about purpose, I know we may not know the specifics and the particulars, but I can see in you that same passion, that all of us who are followers of Christ should carry. And that is that one day we hear from Jesus, “Well done...

Edward:  “Well done good and faithful servant.”

Ben: ...good and faithful servant.” So thank you so much. I’ve really enjoyed getting to know you through this better. Knew of you. Now I know a lot more about you.

Edward: Well, thanks again for allowing me to talk a little bit about my story. But it’s not mine, it’s the Lord’s - the Lord’s story.

Ben: It is.

Edward: So, for those here in the county, if they see me walking around, I’m glad to be home.

Ben: I look forward to being able to shake your hand some day.

Edward: When all this virus is done.

Ben: Yeah.

Edward: Thank you.

Ben: God bless.

Edward: Yes sir.